What?

HEY THERE!

It’s been some time since i last blogged. My week has been great so far! Got accepted into college without having to take my O levels which means my results are good enough to skip a year and get into Polytechnic! Woo Hoo!

That aside, i’m feeling sad because i miss Avenged Sevenfold so much!!! Wish i could turn back time and experience it again!

Few weeks ago, my ex, the one from three four years back, snapchat-ed me. Casually, i replied. And now we’re talking on a daily basis. I dont know how to feel about that. He treated me badly when we were 14 but that was years ago, when we were bloomin’ 14, but i took it so seriously, i fought for him. And i had a tough time movin’ on. Now that we’re already 17, we’re talking back, we haven’t got into any relationship since, so i dont really know what to feel. i just moved on from him a year ago i suppose. So now that we’re talking back, him telling me it was stupid of him to ditch a girl who was worth fighting for, abandoning a relationship worth taking seriously, that he was still a boy. I dont know. Do i still love him? I’ve built a barrier around me since the break up and still many bad things happen to me (in terms of relationships). Like my best friend of four years abandoning our friendship, my unsuccessful connections between guys apart from my two best buddies, S and D. I just can’t seem to make new friends anymore or open myself up to new people. I constantly fail despite having a barrier around me to protect myself. Sometimes i ask myself, is it worth building a barrier around myself? What difference does it make? I personally don’t know but for now, i’m keeping this barrier around me.

Maybe one day, i’ll meet someone special in TP! A friend just as good as my bestfriend, whom of which i could get along with, or maybe a guy i’d finally have a crush on. 😊

xo,ainf.

Advertisements